Proving oneself need only be done between God and self. Sparking one’s inner joy is a soul phenomenon.Taking on more art pieces and projects than I have in a long while, I remember words that were said to me throughout my life from people who I gave too much power to. Too much power over what I did with my talents. “You’re not very good,” “If you don’t go to college now, you never will,” and other comments like that which buried themselves down into the subconscious until I questioned myself and began doubting my abilities.
I think we tend to do that a lot, we seek affirmation of what we do or of who we are; yet we seek it from one another and that can lead to heartache, because we are limited beings that don’t have as much depth perception into the human soul as we would like to believe we do.
There is much more beauty than we realize. In a smile, in a laugh, in off-key singing, in a made up story that our children tell us about the pictures they just drew, in relationships that we have and the struggles we overcome together, in the feel of raindrops hitting our face or the gentle touch of heat on our skin from the sun. I could go on and on with the beautiful things I am noticing more and more that I believe I took for granted before. Because when you allow self-doubt to creep in, and you form a negative self-talk loop it brings you down low; and you miss a lot.
I had a lot of self-doubt with regards to my art; but it is something that I absolutely love doing. After a check in with Poppa Gnome (we touch base with how we’re doing and stay forward focused), he responded to one of my questions with noticing that I put my whole entire self fully into a project when I take it on. I don’t think I ever realized that I did that before, but that’s how I am with my art. It’s an intimate connection with the inner parts of myself and I get very sensitive with the outcome. I have learned that it brings me joy, even if there isn’t anything planned for it to go anywhere, hang anywhere or have a purpose- other than just creating it and letting it flow from me.
We tend to give others too much power in deciding who we are, what we like, what we should expect, et cetera et cetera. It is honestly a wonder why we do that.
“Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.”-Eleanor Roosevelt
I think it’s absolutely vital that we all connect with our inner self and find what sparks true joy, and do that. To not neglect it with the chaos of the world or our busy schedules, but to set aside time specifically for those things so that we can rest and recuperate, let our souls heal and blossom.
What is it for you that sparks joy? Do you set aside time for it everyday? If not, how come?
Who has the power over your joy?
