Psalm 139:23 says, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.”
I learned different coping techniques, in Celebrate Recovery, several years ago to help keep me from falling back into hurtful and destructive patterns. Unfortunately, when one neglects to utilize these tools, relapse can happen. In my case, a relapse means that having a lot of life happening and not taking the time for introspection and self correction can cause a domino effect in regards to the position of my heart.
How I think things through, whether I reflect or react and whether I am pausing to consider how my internal feelings are affecting my external interactions/circumstances. This position, be it negative or positive, affects relationships with those in our inner circle, our ability to do our work, our ability to sleep, our mental/emotional health and many other facets that are deeply valuable in our lives.
Because it’s been awhile since I have posted, I find it fitting to write about a particular coping technique today and that is, doing a daily H.E.A.R.T. check, and asking myself:
Am I:
H-urting
E-xhausted
A-ngry
R-esentful
T-ense
I haven’t shared the recovery principles of Celebrate Recovery before, but I will today. They are biblically based principles- specifically from the Beatitudes found in the New Testament. The principle is given along with the corresponding bible verse to establish the value of it in our lives and in our recovery.
The Road to Recovery Based on the Beatitudes
Realize I’m not God; I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and that my life is unmanageable. (Step 1)
“Happy are those who know that they are spiritually poor.” Matthew 5:3a TEV
Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to Him and that He has the power to help me recover. (Step 2)
“Happy are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” Matthew 5:4 TEV, NIV
Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ’s care and control. (Step 3)
“Happy are the meek.” Matthew 5:5a TEV
Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps 4 and 5)
“Happy are the pure in heart.” Matthew 5:8a TEV
Voluntarily submit to any and all changes God wants to make in my life and humbly ask Him to remove my character defects. (Steps 6 and 7)
“Happy are those whose greatest desire is to do what God requires” Matthew 5:6a TEV
Evaluate all my relationships. Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt me and make amends for harm I’ve done to others when possible, except when to do so would harm them or others. (Steps 8 and 9)
“Happy are the merciful.” Matthew 5:7a TEV; “Happy are the peacemakers” Matthew 5:9 TEV
Reserve a daily time with God for self-examination, Bible reading, and prayer in order to know God and His will for my life and to gain the power to follow His will. (Steps 10 and 11)
Yield myself to God to be used to bring this Good News to others, both by my example and my words. (Step 12)
“Happy are those who are persecuted because they do what God requires.” Matthew 5:10 TEV
This Heart check comes from the O- Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. This principle also corresponds with the 12 step program; specifically steps 4 & 5. Those are definitely intense, but highly valuable steps in the healing process.
I did a step study a few years back, which is a small group of men or women and that study through the steps in their own time and then come together for fellowship and sharing/discussing for the accountability portion of the study. It was a very eye opening experience for me; and you are welcome to do as many step study sessions as you feel you need for recovery.
Personally, I healed a lot of the BIG T traumas with my initial step study, but have along the way neglected to do my daily check ins- and have come to the realization that I need to do another step study- specifically for step 4 -which is inventory of your hurts/habits/hang ups. I personally need to inventory my habits and figure out which habits I have allowed to slide back into destruction and cause me to feel so bleh.
A really crucial factor in the heart check, is to not only allow yourself to be aware- but also to bring in a close friend and God- so that you are not alone in this and so that healing can begin by bringing it to the light and having accountability through the healing & growth process.
I’m going to leave you with some of my favorite verses about the attitude of the heart and my inner thoughts on them. Friends, I want you to take the time to pause and truly reflect with yourself; How are you, how is your H.E.A.R.T.?
Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding
(Our perspective is limited in the grand scheme of things; it can and will fail us at times)
Proverbs 4:23 Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it
(Whether it be Love, Mercy & Grace or Bitterness, Anger & Resentment flowing from it)
Matthew 6:21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
(When our priorities shift, because we don’t keep a watchful eye, it deeply affects who we are)